Missing my first dog

I’m sitting here in office just after having read something that reminded me very painfully of the very first dog that i could call my own. Max. All the other dogs that i’ve had before were family dogs, shared by my parents and my brother. They never were MY dog. A couple of years ago my wife walked in through the front door cradling a little black bundle that looked terrified and also pissed off. Soon he had taken control not only of the house but also of my heart. He could piss me off to the max, and then turn right around and act so sweet no one could ever dream of scolding him. He was the happiest little dog i had ever seen. Even when he was seriously ill and on saline and antibiotics for days at a stretch, he always had a wag in his tail and a smile on his face for everyone, even the doctors at the vet’s.

The way things worked out I wasn’t around for him when he needed me the most and I know it probably puzzled and hurt him as to why I had walked out the door and never come back. But, brave little puppy that he was, he gave and gave of everything his little heart could. Until one day i got a call saying his heart had finally given up. I guess even the biggest hearts have their limits.

I cried as I wrapped him in garbage bags for lack of anything else and put him in a cold hole i had dug in the ground. Alone in the dark, which he hated so much. I wished so much that i could have patted his head just one more time and seen his eyes close in joy instead of death.

I still feel sad. I still feel guilty. He was the first dog that I truly thought of as mine, and i miss him. 

It’s been a long day…..So what’s new ya?

Its the end of the day, and like every other Monday, things have been quite hectic. Haven’t really done much writing, but have certainly been giving the old brain cells a serious workout. Thanks to you guys who took the trouble to actually make some comments on this amateur’s blog. It’s much appreciated.

Well, the general sentiment so far seems to be that it doesn’t matter whether I have a passion for writing or not. As long as I have the talent for it, it makes me a writer. However going back to the comment made by Brandix, it seems to be very important to have a passion for what you do. He has the talent to sing and act but his passion is to write. I totally agree with that, because if you lack the passion, you might as well not do it at all.

I do know that i feel quite pssionate about advertising as a whole. But do I feel passionate about writing in isolation? To be very truthful, the answer is no. I definitely do not feel passionate about writing. So then should I remain in the business of selling soap, but move out of writing?

I’m passionate about coming up with fresh ideas and ways to reach into people’s hearts. So maybe I should be looking into new ways in which I could use this passion more productively for myself and for the industry as a whole.

3 Days…….2 Posts

Okay, here I am. Sitting here at my machine and wondering what i should put down to fill the big blank space on this page. Shouldn’t it be something profound and moving? Afterall, people who visit blogs want to be entertained and tittilated. Or maybe I should write a touching poem that will leave the readers misty eyed and satisfied. God, what crap runs through my mind whenever I’m faced with a blank page!

 Right! So there’s no poems that seem to pop into my mind nor is there anything totally profound that’s just waiting to erupt from my mind. So instead, let me tell you about a conversation I had with three actual writers yesterday. Having told them about my blog and what I was hoping to achieve with it, I was soon listening to a discussion of what exactly defines a writer. Well, the long and short of it was, that even though I may not love to write, I still DO classify as a writer simply because I write. Whether I write for pleasure or for filthy lucre does not seem to make much of a difference in their opinion.

So does this mean that my search is over almost before it began? I don’t think so. For me this seems to be a sort of easy way out. So I think I will continue to blunder around trying to make sense of what makes one a writer in the truest sense.

Before I log off, as a true writer, I should have an enduring love for Shakespeare, Yeats, Jane Austen, yada, yada, yada ad nauseum right? The truth is I don’t. I’ve never ever read any of the so called literary giants. In fact I find them quite boring. Does this mean I don’t have the true writers soul that yearns for such inspirational food?

Every journey starts with a small step and all that blah blah blah

Hello world and welcome to the Kill Romeo Project. This is my first attempt at blogging ever. I was struggling for ages to figure out a name for this blog and someone who knows me very well (I think), suggested I use “Romeo must die” as the title. My first response was “why?” to which I got the answer, “if you don’t get it, never mind”. I guess she knows something about me that i’m yet to find out. So let’s see if whatever she was hinting at will come out in the open ya?

Okay, I’m sure there’ll be loads of people out there wondering why I’ve suddenly decided to jump on the “Blogging Bandwagon”.  Well, I spend most of my day for the past 7 plus years, writing for money. Nothing else, just churning out words for the cash to pay the bills, feed the dogs, buy the booze, etc. I have rarely (if ever) wrote anything for the sheer pleasure of writing, and that worries me to an extent. People who work with me, see me as a writer, but isn’t a writer someone who loves to write? Isn’t he a person who would die if his pen were to be taken away from him? I on the other hand, would die if my cash were taken away from me. I believe I could live my life very happily if I never had to write a word again. So what does that make me? I guess this blog is a way of me finding out if I’m really a writer at heart or if I’m just a soap salesman.

So if this happens to be the first and last post on my blog………. you’ll probably find me at your doorstep, with a crate of soap and a jingle to sing!