Secrets…

Was sitting at my computer and wondering what I should do, other than work of course! Contemplated writing a ‘it’s the end of the year’ type post, but then, everybody knows that right? Considered another rant about the many gripes and grouses I have with the powers that be, both in government and in office, but then again, what’s new about that. That’s when a certain topic was brought to mind by an email I received. It’s a topic that generates heaps of gossip, but is still an unavoidable factor in most people’s lives. So here goes.

If you actually think about it, there’s one thing that practically everybody in the world has in common. No matter how much we deny it, it still exists. What is it? Simply put…. it’s secrets. The ones we keep hidden deep down inside of us and hope to God no-one else ever finds out about. Now I’m sure each and everyone of you out there are smiling a little bit to yourselves right?

But seriously, think about it, isn’t there at least one little thing in your life that you keep to yourself? No matter how close you’re to someone in your life, there’ll definitely be something you’ve consciously or unconsciously kept from them. You may have the very best of reasons for doing so, like not wanting to hurt the other person’s feelings, or simply because its something too personal to share with anyone else. But still, the secrets DO exist.

While I’m not trying to preach here on the rights or wrongs of this, I do feel it’s rather sad when people who claim to, and very often actually do, trust each other with their very lives, they still feel the need to keep some parts of their lives a secret. Why is this? I guess it could be out of a personal need to have certain parts of their lives private and not be ‘public’ knowledge. It also could be the fear of being misjudged and labelled as different or weird. Either ways, doesn’t it come down to being able to trust the people you call your friends, that they will be able to understand you and accept you no matter what you’ve done? I mean, if you can’t trust your friends to do this, then why even call them your friends?

Personally speaking, I have had the bad experience of my best friends at the time, turning their backs on me and not wanting anything more to do with me. And that hurt like hell! These were guys who had gone through a lot of stuff together for many years. In a lot of ways, we were closer to each other than our own families. But still, when the shit hit the fan, they decided to cop out on me.

I used to be really bitter and hurt about the whole experience, and to an extent, I still am. But what I have come to realise, while writing this post, is the reason the shit actually hit the fan is that I had hidden certain things from them. Yes, I did have the very best of reasons for not telling them, because I felt that involving them in what was happening was going to put them in unwanted risk. But in actual fact, if I had bothered to share with them what was happening, they may very well have been able to prevent the situation from ever happening. I just didn’t trust them enough to give them the chance to help me out till it was too late. So in a way, I guess their rejection of me, was a justified reaction to the hurt they felt. I think they felt as let down by me as I felt let down by them.

I think that if we just trust our friends a little more everyday, and share with them the things that are going on in our life, it may actually help us get through this crazy world in better shape. It’s just a simple matter of letting your friends help out in whatever way they can. True, they may have stuff to tell you that you don’t really want to hear, but then what if that stuff is the honest truth and what you need to hear? Isn’t it better to have your friends tell you the honest truth and not have to realise it when it’s too late?

So here’s to the New Year, may it show me the way to be more understanding towards the people I love, and may I also learn to trust them a lot more with each new day.

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2 Responses to “Secrets…”

  1. shehal Says:

    secrets -> your identity 🙂
    happy new year
    oh look out for that comet if you’re out lighting crackers tonight

  2. realfantasy23 Says:

    Secrets can never remain secrets which I’ve experinced very badly and as Brandon also says. But I agree with you here, when you say “we have best friend or whoever in life with whom we share everything”. U might wanna think again and then say EVERYTHING.

    Even I have kept and still keeping alot of secrets within me, because I’m scared to let them out, but not becaue I’ll be misjudged or labelled but because EVERYONE will know and they will get another “spicy topic” to gossip about and at the end more than me my dear ones will have to suffer, I’m already suffering so don’t care for myself but cant see suffering those who I love.

    But tell you one more thing, I’ve found single person with whom I’ve started to share my secrets, yep still some left but iy’ll take time to reveal all 😛 .

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